Monday, March 17, 2008

veiw from behind

Have you ever felt that moment
 when you look in the mirror
and think you've lost weight,
 then look over your shoulder
 and find it?
Happens to me a lot
So I've got these black stretch pants on
the front looks good.
Fearful of the cushion lurking behind me,
 I ask my husband,
 "how does this look?"
As all men 
who have been happily married for a long time do,
he answered "fine"
much too quickly.
Now my Tom is not easily duped.
 when I ask him,
"do I look fat?"
his immediate answer is<
 "Do I look stupid?"
but I explained to him
that I know I am a hot 50 year old
(how's that for an oxymoron?)
 I just want to know
 if this is appropriate for school.
"fine", he reassured me again.
I get to school
walk past EVERYONE I know
get into my classroom
 and feel this HUGE lump
on my leg
 like an extra butt cheek
 halfway down my thigh.
What in the hell is that?
I pull a pair of tights out
of my pant leg
that had me looking
like I had a giant tumor!
So much for his future as a fashion consultant!

16 comments:

plieck30 said...

You're sooo funny. Paula

dklars said...

Hahahaaaaaaa that was a good story.  Just goes to show men don't really even LOOK at us after we've been married for so long!!  ~~Kath~~

nhd106 said...

ROFL!   Good one!

Nancy
http://journals.aol.com/nhd106/Nancyluvspix/entries/2008/03/17/aol-community-photo-challenge-beginners/2174

princesssaurora said...

LOL  Oh my... he didn't look too hard did he??  LOL  Life... ya just havta laugh!  LOL

be well,
Dawn
http://journals.aol.com/princesssaurora/CarpeDiem/

toonguykc said...

I got rid of my full-length mirror sometime around the age of 36.  Don't need to see anything below my shoulders.  ;)

Russ

sdoscher458 said...

LOL...so funny. My hubby whenever he is asked "How do I look"...tells me - that's a loaded question...mostly he says great, fine or whatever. They hate being asked. I guess we really need to count on our own instincts when it comes to how we look...love, Sandi

ukgal36 said...

that is freaking hilarious!
my arse looks lik two ferrets are trapped in there and are fighing to get out!!
Lyn
http://journals.aol.com/ukgal36/Britsblog/

bhbner2him said...

ROFL!!! Priceless.  -  Barbara

deshelestraci said...

LOL!  Oh dear!
Traci

gazker said...

LOLOLOL OMG, I nearly pissed myself then with that story. I thought maybe one of the male students was a little over excited standing next to you ;-)
Gaz xx

kamdghwmw said...

My husband knows better then say anything. Then again I know better then to wear streatch clothing! I look good for a women who is 37, but not that good.
Kelli
Http://journals.aol.com/kamdghwmw/noonmom

ktkamanski said...

Some may soar like Eagles and then there are those that fly like buzzards! Miss you and your quick wit. Just missin your visits! Take care of you and as always, your's as well,
Katie

am4039 said...

lol you are way to funny. I have done stuff like that too.

lurkynat said...

awwwwwwwwwwwwww Marti (HUGGGGGGGGGGGS)
youare way to beautiful to worry trust me!
love,natalie
p.s.
I loved your rainforest comemnt in my blog thanks!
p.p.s.
are you any good at sports?
love,nat

bosoxblue6993w said...

Marti, no matter which way I turn, my ass is still behind me.

mumma4evr said...

OMG....I thought I was the only person who had stuff end up in my pants like that!  LOL
Beck