camoflauge

It is 4 AM when I awake with that feeling that you get when it's time for the baby to nurse when they are infants.

That same feeling lets you know they are up to something 15 years later.

I look in the living room where 4 teenage girls were sprawled watching old Friends reruns when I went to bed.

No kids.

I go out the front door and find the girls and a few boys ,too.

"Hello" I said, quite cheerfully , considering the circumstances.

They all froze, like deer in the headlights.

Do they think I wont see them?

Being a special education teacher, I know to give specific instructions.

"Girls, you need to go inside now.'

Still friendly.

They wordlessly file past me and sit on the couch.

The boys, apparently, have turned to stone (no jokes about hardness, this is my baby here)

Further instructions seem to be in order.

"Boys, you can go home now."

No, I'm not angry.

It's like a chess game.

Their objective is to get away with everything they can.

My job is to catch them.

Only poor sports get angry playing a game!

Checkmate for mom this time!

 

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vacation

so....school is over.

The speech teacher and I stood on our desks and belted out a raccous and tuneless version of "School's Out for the Summer"that would've made Alice Cooper really chop his head off (those of you who don't understand this reference probably don't have crow's feet either)

 

Here we all gathered,

 Paula and her girls with their soft Atlanta voices....

Dear Stephanie, with her spirit stronger through her illness.....

Stacey with her bluster hiding her kind heart....barreling in from Mississippi

Dana of the sharp tongue and unswerving loyalty 

There was a slight noise...

only if you were really attuned could you hear it 

It was the universe falling into place.....

The Lagoonatics were all in one spot again....

We went to Dana's

slept on the dock to the sound of the waves

woke to the sun and floated the days away on the bay.

Shouting the cry, "Party at Marti's"we spent the once in a lifetime half and  half birhday party with about 60 other brave souls from the ages of 14 months on up.

See, this summer, Mariah is 25 and I am 50!

It was a great party!

When I get my puter issues resolved we'll see pictures.

Till then, walk softly on this good green earth and party like you're halfway home!

Marti

catchin' up

I have been absent for awhile,

 partially due to various adventures,

 mostly due to ANOTHER COMPUTER SCREW UP!!!!!!!!!!!!

 I hate BellSouth DSL!!!!!!!!!! 

 I pitched such a bitch this time I am supposedly getting a month free service, an upgrade and a free digital camera.....

we'll see.....

right now I am still writing on a friends computer.

Updates...

well, the awful inevitable happened

Caitlin failed algebra and got booted from the cheerleading squad.

God love her, it is the first thing ever in her life she couldn't "sweetandcute" her way out of.

A hard lesson,

An overdue one.

I hope she won't have to learn them all the hard way.

She wailed.

I sniffed.

The guidance counselor and the cheerleading coach hung on each others shoulders.

Caitlin's lessons are hard on all of us.

The next day I lay in bed, dreading to face her.

She stuck her head around the door of my room of gloom and said ,

"I'm over it, Mom,

 let's go to the beach!"

More later, I promise.

I must go.....the hazards of the borrowed computer...

cyberlessly yours,

Marti

PS Thanks Martha, for giving me a nod to get started up again!

The Joys of Attention Deficit Disorder

I was having one of those lovely wifely conversations with my dear husband the other day.

We were talking about bad habits.

His, of course.

I was telling him he shouldn't smoke.

In my discourse, I touched on the fact that I smoke a cigarette occasionally.

I enjoy wine (sometimes lots of wine)

I have several cups of coffee every morning.

But all of these things, I can take or leave.

I dont even drink coffee during the summer when I am out of school.

"I just dont' have an addictive personality, " I bragged to him.

He glanced at me in the typical Tom way, one eye closed against the smoke from his Marlboro.

"You dont' have any bad habits," he intoned, "you can't concentrate long enough to develop any."

There are advantages to ADD.

my lovely compliment

One of my kids, a boy with learning disabilities and severe behavior problems, was standing behind me." Mrs. Smith , I love your hair, it smells so good,"he said."thanks", I answered, trying to get some work done."and I love your pretty earrings," he continued."thanks", I said again, concentrating on my work, but flattered nonetheless. "I love the way your arm jiggles when you write on the board", He tenderly continued.

You know, he could have quit before he got that far!

I'll be damned if I let this job make me crazy!

Yesterday....

I am out front directing traffic when this adolescent looking 5th grader walks into me, saying, "nobody can make me stop"

I said,"ah, baby, don't' start your day off this way"

He shoved me again.

The principal suspended him for 2 days and told me it was not assault because I was not injured.

It's okay.

Poor kid, life has already punished him enough.

He will be in prison soon and I will still be out here directing traffic.

Which brings to my mind...

What other professionals with master's degrees do you see directing traffic?

Doctors in front of hospitals waving stop signs?

Accountants in front of H&R Block waving people into the parking lot?

Today.....

It is going great...

I am teaching up a storm....

My kids are rapt with attention.....

The principal storms in, waving a paper as though it is on fire.

"Do you have your compliance form? THEY are asking for it!"

I said, "my assistant is out today. If you can wait till tomorrow I'll do it, if you want it today , I'll make something up."

She wanted it yesterday.

I made something up.

My colleagues were running around in a panic.

I went back to actually teaching school..

They all think I am kidding.

Hey, I was looking for a job when I got this one. I don't see a line of people wanting to take my place

Revenge of the dog

Tom's dog, Penny, a little blonde cocker, usually makes every step he makes.If he goes in the bathroom and shuts her out ,she will lie on the floor with her nose to the crack in the door and whine piteously.

Well, she has not "spoken" to him since we went to New Orleans & left her for two nights. It is so funny to see him trying to call her and offering her treats , while she turns her head to the side & stares off into space!She acts just like a comic strip wife!

Yesterday,Tom fell into a hole in the yard. He turned his ankle & made a big deal about getting a shovel to fill in the hole.Just as soon as he had finished,  Penny purposefully trotted over & busily dug all the dirt out of the spot, glared at him with a satisfied snort & walked away!

I think she may be trying to kill him!